I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
