Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
