I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
