I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
