But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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