I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Let's paint friendship bongs
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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