Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize