my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
