After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
how drunk are you?
Several
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
