dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
