He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
