Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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