She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
