the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
