Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
