At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
