so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
