Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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