Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
