Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
