I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I look better un-naked...
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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