I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize