Barsexuality is the new black.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
