The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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