let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
