i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Randomize
