You're my little dorito
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
