why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
You need Xanax blowdarts
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
