did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
