He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
