I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Randomize