Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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