Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
