totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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