You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
