Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
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