Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Randomize