tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
