big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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