Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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