Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
