I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
