i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize