Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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