Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
So much rum. So many feels.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
