i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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