I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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