Jerry, you need to find god
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
