I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize