I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
