saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
