you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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