I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
